Where Do We Come From? - Meethe Chongay

I am not from here. Here meaning the Midwest or even the United States. Where I am from is thousands (and thousands) of miles away, India. A country that is truly foreign to me. If it is truly foreign to me, what does that mean for our children?

My parents emigrated to the United States in the 1970s, when doctors, engineers, and other professionals flocked here in search of a better life. I was only a baby. My passport lists my place of birth as Chingleput, but more than that, I cannot tell you. Chingleput lives in my memories from my mother, a small South Indian town near the  city of Madras. My grandparents moved there when my mother was older, so she, too, does not necessarily think of it as home. But it is the place where there is family, where my grandparents are buried, and where I was born.

My thoughts of India come from the stories my parents told me. My grandfather with mango orchards, tending to his land at the crack of dawn in a small village in South India. And my mother talked of visiting temples surreptitiously as a young Muslim going where she was not supposed to go.

I first returned to India when I was eight. I was struck by the cacophony of sights and sounds so foreign to me. We arrived at the airport in the middle of the night. A crush of family met us, and whisked us out into the hot and humid night. My mother easily navigated what seemed to me like chaos. She slipped into her native tongue easily. She haggled with the market vendors, drank chai, and laughed heartily with her sister. It was completely different world from the mainly white suburb I knew as home. Despite the chaos, it's a beautiful place. Miles of rice paddies, fields, and colorful villages with so many different foods and languages.

And so, I have visited India sporadically over the last several years. And for G, the same. So what does that mean for Poet and Flower? We are Indians or Indian Americans but talk about a country we barely know.

And so friends have begun to ask will we take Poet and Flower to India? The easy answer is sure, someday. But I've started to ask myself deeper questions about this. What would a trip to India look like for us? For G and I, we have extended family there, cousins, aunts, and family we have met just a handful of times. I don't have the security blanket of my parents to navigate this foreign country.

And most importantly, we want Poet and Flower to have some connection to their homeland, even if that connection is tenuous. We talk about a place from decades ago when my parents emigrated. India has long moved on, and the place I know truly does not exist. But someday we will go. I am not sure what it will be like, but it is still the place where we truly come from.

Meethe Chongay

This special dessert is often served during the Muslim month of Muharram. It's a special poori topped with confectioner's sugar, fennel, and dried coconut. They are crispy, sweet and quite addictive. You can't eat just one. My Dad grew up with these and loves them and I think you might too.

For dough

• 1 cup whole wheat flour (or roti ki atta)
• 1/2 cup milk
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 2 teaspoons ghee or clarified butter

For filling

• 1/4 cup powdered sugar
• 1/2 teaspoon ground cardamom
• 1/2 teaspoon fennel seeds
• 1 teaspoon poppy seeds
• 1/4 cup chopped pistachios or almonds (optional)
• 1/4 cup sweetened coconut flakes
• 2 teaspoons ghee

1. To make dough: Mix together wheat flour, milk, salt and ghee. You might have to add a tablespoon or two of milk to make the dough soft and pliable. It should not be sticky. Knead for 3-4 minutes until smooth. Cover with a towel and let rest for 15-20 minutes.
2. To make the filling: In a medium bowl, mix together the powdered sugar, cardamom, clove, cinnamon, nuts and coconut flakes. Set aside.
3. Divide the dough into 1 inch balls. Roll them in the palm of your hand to make them into a ball, then flatten gently. Lightly flour a cutting board and roll out into circles that are about 4 inches in diameter. They should be about an 1/8 inch thick.
4. Heat neutral oil in frying pan. When shimmering, fry the chongay until golden. About 30 seconds each side.
5. Drain on a paper towel lined plate. When cool top with filling mixture.
6. 6 . Serve immediately
7. Chongay will keep in an airtight container for up to a week.